Last night we had dinner with Jack's pastor's small group and the topic of Facebook and the use of Facebook came up. I am "friends" on Facebook with most of the people that were at the dinner. Jack is friends with the guys in real life. I am too, but more so on FB. So when we were all standing around chatting, we realized that we knew what was going on in each other's lives, not because we talk to each other regularly, but because we read each other's status updates. I see pictures of these people and their kids quite often. Not because I go to their house and they show me, but because pictures are posted and I am nosy and I look. And I am irritated when people don't caption their pictures so I can know who everyone is and where they are and what they are doing in these photos.
Facebook has taken over.
So, the title of this post. Jack hates facebook. He has threatened for months to delete his account. He still hasn't done it, mainly because I don't want him to because it will change my relationship status on facebook from "Married to Jack..." to just "Married." I want people to know WHO I'm married to! (I realized I ended that sentence with a prepostion... forgive me.) Jack only checks facebook when his email account piles up with friend requests and wall posts and group invitations. I check facebook every day. I tell Jack what all people are doing, who is pregnant, who is moving, etc. etc. The thing is, Jack doesn't care. I care. Hence, a house divided.
I, obviously, don't have a problem with facebook. I heart it. However, dinner parties like last night are a real wake up call for the manner in which our generation communicates. I mean, half of the folks who were there last night are our NEIGHBORS for crying out loud! Many of us live within a few miles of one another. And I will be the first to say that I don't know what's going on with them if it wasn't for good ole FB. I probably won't change my use of facebook, but I do want to be reminded that they are actual PEOPLE that have the facebook pages, the pages don't just appear on their own, the pages are created by actual living human beings and actual real-life FRIENDS.
Last year for Lent I gave up facebook and it was HARD. I felt pretty disconnected, sadly. I used the "you can do it on Sunday" rule, fo' sho. I will probably do that again this year for Lent. The days that I work at Bradley's, I can't check email or facebook. The good thing is, it doesn't cross my mind all day. When I get home, it's not even the first thing I think about. I do check it eventually and it takes me a while to comb through status updates and to see what everyone else has done that day. My problem is that I LOVE to know what people are doing, talking about, eating, blahbitty blah blah. I WANT TO KNOW!!! Someone said last night that stay-at-home moms were the demographic who uses facebook the most. I can definitely see that. It's a way to stay in the know and feel part of things, even if it's impersonal. It's easy and makes you feel connected. I say that with complete openness and knowing that a phone call or face-to-face conversation is perferred, generally. But if you can't do that.... facebook is the answer.
Aside from the status updates and knowing and seeing what everyone you've ever known is doing, I don't participate in the games, the pokes, the applications, etc. I did really love the Flair application... there were some really funny political flair(s?). But when facebook changed it's format, that kind of got lost. I don't have facebook on my cell phone and I don't send people gifts like pandas or toaster ovens. I only post photos once every six months. I didn't post my political opinions. I don't use "Twitter," whatever the heck that is. Currently, I have 85 requests to all sorts of things, and 51 updates that I don't even open.
So maybe facebook isn't all bad and isn't completely destroying us. Or maybe it is. Either way, in our house, we've reached an understanding that I use it and love it and want it, and Jack wants nothing to do with it and thinks its the ruin of our generation(s). The couple who hosted the dinner last night are in their early 50's and were just flabbergasted at our conversation about facebook. They were happy to be in the dark with FB. Jack wants to join them in the dark side. I don't. I'm quite happy to be in the facebook light.
Big Boo Cast: Episode 386
5 days ago
4 comments:
Ok...a point of clarification...I DO care about what is happening in people's lives that matters, but I DON'T care when someone has posted a status update that they're watching Grey's Anatomy and "can't believe how it ended" or whatever. Don't need to know when people are going for a run, a coffee, so on, so on.
That said, I think Buddy Odom should be quoted, "Jack, you cancel your facebook account and you'll meet Jesus." Awesome.
So we're a house divided over this social networking tool, but we still love each other, and amazingly enough, I still care about other people even though I'm poked and graffitied without much response in return.
This post was pretty clever! Because I live in the dark as Jack does, I can only relate a teensy bit. But I got to say, Emily, you made me think that I might get on FB before I'm 60! This statement is not nearly as shocking as all the dreadful national news, but it comes close, since I'm a "media dropout"!
emily - what would we do without facebook - it meant we 'met' before we 'met' and we can keep in touch now so immediately - just for across the pond relationships, which ours has to be (sob) FB is the bee's knees! love it that you have a blog and I love the way you write!! xx
Yeah, I just use it to stalk people too. It's sad that it's taken the place of calling and emailing people tho. (It IS how I found out about your awesome new job!!)
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